#but they dont fucking know anything cuz why would they
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tetsuooooooooooo · 3 days ago
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ok im watching act 3 again to write down my questions and see if anything makes sense this time
edit im 2 eps in this got long as FUCK kjchgxhi come talk to me!!!!! im screeching into the void!!!!!!! americans wake up look at my post!!!!!!!! say everything to me!!!!!!!!!
why are we introducing time travel alternate universes into this story
where did the other ekko go, was he in Our ekkos universe/body or just out of commission, bc that makes no sense i think, if they didnt switch then wheres the ✨symmetry✨
do you think that skye had anything to do with them figuring out the cleaning flowers thing in the AU? and is viktor dead? and jayce in jail? banished? i wonder where skye went here i hope shes living her best not in love with a gay guy life
where the FUCK was the Original-AU heimerdonger when he got bodysnatched by the Our version? they do still call him professor but in Our version he just recently got kicked out of the council so would he still be just freeloadin around zaun at that point in the AU? was he ever councilor?
can everyone on my screen Please stop hurling their guts out from timetraveldisease
if theres no hextech and no anomaly in the AU reality then how did it throw them in it in the first place
ekko is smart but if he was smarter hed stay around to research what needed to happen to make zaun work in this version and save himself time figuring it out from the groundup back home, i think
but also what the fuck COULD have possibly happened to make it so different CUZ LIKE- ok the little flashback bit with vi dying in jayces house- the gang is wearing the same clothes as in Our version, so that would probably indicate that THAT zaun was also in the same state as Our ""original"" version too? right? no? i mean i would say they did put emphasis on clag n mylos clothes being different and more piltovian or whatever idk maybe im onto nothing WAIT NO BECAUSE CLAGGOR WAS MAKING THE DAMN FLOWER TO CLEAN THE POLLUTION SO IF THATS STILL THERE THEN IT COULDNT HAVE BEEN RESOLVED THAT MUCH EARLIER HERE RIGHT
also what the fuck had to be different exactly for enforcers to bust the kids after blowing up a building and not chuck them all in stillwater this time around? did they really care that much about vi dying? was that really the inciting incident for zauns inclusion? marcus? fucking MARCUS marcus? marcus "im gonna bury the lot of you" "deals with the devil to get a 14 yearold put in jail for life"* marcus sees a zaunite girl dead (after breaking into a piltover home and wrecking it) and just goes "aw :c" ? the council of rich businessfucks like salo whod do everything they can to maintain the status quo? is One Dead Kid (still the name of my nonexistent band) really all it takes this time? am i too tough on these people am i dumb if id like some elaboration on how that whole story went or
*to be honest i. dont really get what that Deal thing with silco was about in the first place
wheres Scar aaaat show me my guyy whERES VIKAAA
how did the shimmer story end up in the AU because IF the main change here is vis death then i could believe that silco WAS still already on track with beginning the production at that point if of course singed is also in the same position as Originally
is there a universe where that hammer lands on jayjays head and ends him right there
did silco forgive vanvan before or after zaun gets their "win" in the AU? because my bet is DEFINITELY after
ALSO how the fuck in a city like piltover did they not renovate jayces blown up flat after fuck knows how many years, at LEAST 3 (id wager at least 7 but thats just me so whatever) like city of progress who?? is it just there as like a cautionary tale??? did they put up a lil plaque for jayce after he kild himself?? they just boarded that shit up tho there was nobody there?? why did they leave it like that idk
WHY did heimerdeimer die???? DID he die?? why did he DIE?????? what happens to the AU-Original hongerdonger??? you couldnt have just waited 10 minutes and have powder do allat?? she trusted us right? maybe not
why WAS bonking viktor in the head with the zdrive the answer to our problems
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powder knew what she was doing with that innovators cum petition sign right
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WHAT the FUCK was that mylo claggor moment like am i inSANE OR WAS THIS SUS AS HELL also (man rapping) put some FUCKING RESPECT on stromaes name
how DID rizzard viktor stop being purple actually. god i still hate that reveal im not smart but i refuse to believe that was good writing
what happened to put that rock in jayces wrist? it wasnt a process it was viktor doing it in a split second why did that need to happen? so he wouldnt lose it? hunh?
no because WHAT IS AMBESSAS FUCKING GOAL HERE IN THE END
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does she want kino back? whAT DO YOU WANT WOMANNNN
did that princess girl that got her head sliced off by bessa in the first season actually have anything to do with anything in the end or not cuz im just confuzzled
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how does he know that
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what does that mean
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how does SHE know THAT
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what does THAT mean
does loris have the same accent as vik??????
where the fuck did that ginger binch come from in the first place is she from piltover or noxus if shes from piltover what did ambessa give her and when
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Neither of them would say ANY of this shit
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wonder what vi would say if she saw this conversation before her and cait decided to pork
im just gonna choose to believe she was in there for like 5 hours so her labrador attention span just reset and she chilled out about jinx (actually ykw i guess im willing to believe at this point she doesnt really care that much if jinky offs herself or not)
what the FUCK ARE these goddamn doll puppet thingies viktor makes why are they LIKE that why is THIS the theme here (because orianna and Plot) (but like dyouknow what i mean)
what the fuck was the point of Skye Young as a character in this entire story other than a Gaydar Jammer. with all respect to skyvik stans but like. what is it.
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lmao you abandoned them much before that guys
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we stan a I Gave You Food And A Roof Why Are You Sad You Ungrateful Ingrate queen
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it REALLY DOESNT DOES IT JGHCCGHIBC
why DID skye die again? they wouldnt have just? integrated? again? or smthn? why is this a one-passenger ride all of a sudden? we already got a hivemind thing goin? whatsup?
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lonelyplanetfag · 3 months ago
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when is somebody gonna care abt me the same way i care abt them🤣🤣🤣🙏🔥icant do this shit anymore
#i shiuld call her probably#why isnt anything like it fucking used to be lmao#like yeah iwas fucking miserable but ive always been fucjing miserable#at least i had somebody#or felt like i had somebody#cuz i havent felt like thst in so long n ijust pushed it down n pushed it down n pushed it down n im never gonna get it back#but i cant just ignore it anymore but i cant not ignore it either#it just hurts either way n i dont know how to fix it#i wanna feel important again or like i matter or Somethjng#wanna feel like skmebody knows me#n im so fucking repressed n terrified n stupid that i dont know how to make it happen#i cant make friends at school or anywhere else n ive tried yk im always fucking trying#n i cant hardly go anywhere else anyway cuz i dont pass#n everybody says its cuz im not trying enough or i dont want it enough but i AM trying n i DO want it#i fucking tear myself apart about it every fucking night and people say im not fucking trying n im dont fucking want it#but they dont fucking know anything cuz why would they#im always trying so fucking hard#n lord knows i'm always fucking wanting#ijust don't hardly talk abt it to anybody cuz it makes them miserable n just cuz i'm miserable doesnt mean anybody else needs to be#im so tired man im so goddamn tired#idont wanna have to try so hard. nobody else has to try so fuckjn hard just to mess it up n get laughed every fuckin day#n people say to just ignore it but theyve never been there they dont know how it feels#n it's so tiring#i don't wanna do this shit anymore idont care how fuckin good it gets#i just wanna be done#n iwant somebody to love me so much it hurts#cuz m always loving people thst much n i never get it back#n im trying to jsut take what i can fucking get but it hurts all the time
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spaciebabie · 29 days ago
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at first getting diagnosed with cptsd was like, "yay my trauma has been validated (it always was valid)!" and i really thought that was going to be it, but then i started to do research as i do whenever i realize i have something and learned that!! the way i experience socialization is!! quite horrid actually!!
#i have had this stupid fucking rule for myself for years since i was little#''dont speak unless you're spoken to or else something bad will happen. nobody wants to hear what you have to say unless they ask''#I TELL MYSELF THAT ALL THE TIME????#AND I DIDNT REALIZE IT WASNT NORMAL#thats not something that healthy people think to themselves whenever they want to talk to people. they just talk to them#they dont tell themselves not to speak to people for fear of what may happen to them jesus christ spacie#i get so scared when i message anybody ANYTHING#bc everything and anything i wanna talk about feels so stupid why would anyone give a shit#staring at a funny joke i want to send someone for 30 fucking minutes before deleting it b/c my brain is like ''errmm who cares?''#''also they're going to yell at you for wasting their time!!!''#i sent my friend a meme once and had a panic attack (or maybe a flashback?? im still trying to figure out what they are) immediately after#this shit sucks dude. it sucks#at least im processing what happened to me. thats why it hurts so bad rn its been stockpiled for like.#2 decades#im not looking for any sympathy here im just putting it out there#so that anybody who feels the same way i do know they're not alone#ive been struggling everyday for like 2 months now (actually DEFINITELY longer)#it will get better. things just need to be taken one step at a time#i have gotten thru my worst days i have a 100% success rate#how many days have i been alive#7930#lightwork#lets keep it goin#vent#trauma tw#trauma mention#wrote this post thru a flashback btw!! dealing with them is getting easier#before i would be unable to function for days at a time!!!#with one of the most recent ones i had i was so in the thick of it i avoided everyone i knew for a week cuz i was convinced#i was an evil unlovable freak that only wanted to hurt people
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n0bluev · 4 months ago
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@fushiglow hmm….wonder who i’d draw this for all of a sudden and why… 🤔🤔
#your reblog surprised me#THREE BUNS SUGURU (STAR WARS ER JUST FOR YOU!)#theyre covering riko or smt and smuggling her places (??)#drawing this i was like ‘oh suguru’s curses in a star wars environment should be robots and stuff#so this suguru is a mecanic (he makes them from scrappy parts people have thrown out#and trash materials (and hard work 😎)#diy pokemon#because what is the cursed energy people are letting out if not junk theyre letting go of#so yeah ; basic geto takes shit and turns it useful#i do realise thats already very generic for star wars (junk robots junk robots!) but like. yknow. this guy takes shit people wouldnt bother#trying to sell. miam. junk of the junk. geto my favourite recycling bin you were designed for a luxurious lifestyle clearly (gege not me!)#(and stuff…………. but im lazy to put my vision in words rn hah..)#gojo’s probably a princess#(let’s not lie. hes basically a prince already (clan heir is a different look on him))#this made me want to write ?.??#problem is i dont remember much about star wars (watched it as a kid (we have the cds) appart from the very basic storyline… i forgot 😔#then theres the jawa’s first appearance cuz for some reason they scared me and i am marked for life (THEYRE JUST SILLY LITTLE GUYS 😭😭))#thankfully i lowkey want to rewatch everything so these issues can be fixed#(unthankfully either way the chance of me writing anything is very slim BUT WE NEVER KNOW RIGHT)#(hashtag diverging your attention from that other older post is it working /j/j)#omg glo ​i still didnt read balance (i think of it from time to time but im intimidated to read it because i know its right up my alley and#that i will love it and lately idk why but i need to ready myself emotionally to read peak fiction (this is so dumb but its true 😭😭))#my bad im rambling lol#WAIT FUCK SAME THING FOR BUNNY’S RECENT THINGY THAT GOT IN MY AO3 UPDATE MAIL#A LOVE STORY TOLD THROUGH THE LENS OF A THIRD PARTY MY BELOVED#(itsg ive searchef for these types of stories in advanced search before#AND NOW THAT I HAVE SOME BY AUTHORS I ALREADY ADORE .. IM- I SEE THEM BUT. THEIR CONTENTS STAY A MYSTERY. IS THIS MY BODY SUBCONSCIOUSLY FI#FIGHTING THE TEAR LOSS I WOULD GET??? IS THIS MFING [BALLING-MY-EYES-OUT] PREVENTION !? WITHOUT MY PERMISSION..!? TCH!)#my bad. ramble again o7 — see ya glo !#wip
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oceanwithouthermoon · 7 months ago
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i think its weird that i have to make this disclaimer but the internet is crazy so wtvr,, anyway,,
if i say i dont like something, that doesnt mean "that thing is bad and nobody should post it.."
i swear literally every time i even mention that i dislike something, people will go "wow does that mean u fucking hate me cuz i post that thing? ur a fucking stupid bitch and all ur opinions r wrong" LIKE ?? er.. no. just because i say i dont like certain characterizations of certain characters (the saiki k fandom is CRAZY about this cuz i can state an opinion on literally any character and a group of people will still go 'well only we're allowed to post our opinions about them because we're always right!1!1!'), or certain ship tropes (mentioned my hatred of toxic yaoi maybe once or twice on here months ago and people STILL get mad at me as if i said toxic yaoi lovers r evil or something), or certain ships, or WHATEVER, does not mean that i HATE the people who are posting them or that i think they shouldnt post them at all, NO, im just posting about my personal tastes on my personal blog and it would be extremely weird and hypocritical if i decided that i was the ONLY person that was allowed to do that,,
i think the only reason people assume that is because there are a lot of other people on here who ARE like that, and a lot of people toe the line between posting that they dont like something and posting that they think everyone who likes that thing is stupid, annoying, and wrong,, so i guess all i can say is, sorry for whatever made you make these assumptions but they arent true about me so plz leave me alone ʘ‿ʘ ur doing the same thing to me that ur accusing me of but i didnt do it in the first place so ur just actively being a dick for no reason
#crazy that the mindset some people on here have is that theyre the only ones allowed to post their opinions#ive repeated this a lot on this blog but i rlly think people forget that the person on the other side of the screen is in fact a person#if ur harassing people and publicly making fun of them then ur just as bad as any real life bully#that shit isnt as funny or harmless as u like to pretend it is#not once have i ever targetted anyone or went on someones blog to harass them over my opinion#yet people think its fine to do the same to me and treat it as if its like. revenge or something#like ? me saying 'i dont like toxic yaoi' is not equivalent to someone going on someone elses page and going 'how tf do u like toxic yaoi'#I DONT CARE !! all ive ever done is sit in my own little bubble and had opinions and that makes people mad#honestly though the people who will publicly talk and post abt it are significantly meaner#and i want to act like im not bothered by it because i know most of them r just angry that someone has a different opinion#and they want all their followers to bandwagon off of them (idk why maybe for validation or whatever-same reasons anyone would bully)#but seriously if u actually do think that something i said was out of line and crossed thise boundaries- just fucking tell me ?#im a person bro. ur solution to disagreeing with me shouldnt be 'lol im gonna post abt this and make everyone harass them'#have a conversation with me dude i dont bite ? if u cant talk to me like a person then just dont fucking say anything wtf#its so cowardly to be like 'well no i didnt wanna say anything to u cuz i didnt wanna be rude.. so instead i publicly made fun of u!'#LIKE WHATTTT STOPPPPP </3333#ok anyway this post wasnt supposed to get THAT serious.#MY POINT IS just be considerate of other people and dont base ur hatred off of assumptions#ur deflecting the blame onto someone else because u dont want to admit that ur just a fucking bully lol#being inconsiderate on here is something ive also been guilty of back when i first joined the fandom and was clueless#but grown ass adults who have been on here way longer r still doing that shit which is crazy#and i cant say anything because they have so much leverage over me and idk if its on purpose or if they dont even realize#ok im putting fandom tags cuz i want people to see this sorry. this is my one post thats actually targetted but its at a lot of people#so if u look at this and think 'hey i do that' pls evaluate urself<3#i mean its also targetted at everyone who does this anonomously so i dont know who it is OKOK IM DONE BYE SORRY HOPE THIS IS UNDERSTANDABLE#watch nobody read this fr#saiki k#tdlosk#the disastrous life of saiki k.#meows post
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thebigqueer · 3 months ago
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2 years ago i fucked up a friendship w a girl (that im pretty sure i was in love with). to this day i think of her and sometimes when i see her on the street i just wanna cry. i understand your plight very much.
yeahhh man im sorry to hear that!!! it genuinely fucking sucks and i would never wish this upon anyone. cuz like it makes you fully think about all the what ifs and i genuilnely dont think ill ever find someone like her again
#im not trying to sound dramatic im being so serious she was so fucking perfect for me#i geuss the difference is shes the one who broke up w me and i know i didnt do anything wrong#neither of us did#its just like fuck!!! you know?? like we could have been so much#serious relationships dont need to be longterm to be serious you know???#one of these days im going to get tipsy and then 'drunk' text her even though i fiully intend to text her#and then claim i was just drunk because im notl ying im just not telling the full truth#like i fully considered it last night but i knew it would be a bad idea and i know if i do it its just gonna fuck things up more#but im soooo tempted man#like i dont know what itll even do#i know inside my goal is to maybe convince her that its not our time to end but i know in reality#its just gonna make her feel guilty and push her away even more if i show her how much ic are abou ther#i just seriously wish i understood why she even did it#i also thought being back on campus would help and i mean it has for sure becuase ive had my friends to distract me#but the thing is im not enjoying anything. like im not being distracted im just being numbed ykwim#cuz the moment i leave my friends all i do is think about her#and even when im WITH my friends ill be in the moment w them and then 2 minutes later ill start zoning out thinking about her#like the worst part about this is i dont have any anger *against* her#maybe im angry about like the general situation but the anger isnt against her#and while being angry is its own kind of pain in a way it can be easier cuz at least then youre tempted to have a good time and show off#but when its like this where youre just sad at the situation like what am i actually gonna do except think about her#sorry anon im not trying to dump on you i just start ranting in the tags sometimes#sunny rambles#anon tag#asks
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velvetreds · 4 months ago
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me when i want to eat suna as in nom nom nom likr chicken fry but i need to be normal
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jrwiyuri · 1 year ago
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I’m always so fascinated by fan culture.. is there like genuine research on why people act the way they do to normal human beings.
#stupid snake talk#like why ppl are obsessed with face reveals#and information in general but my mind went to face revelas#cause I remembered that one person who like.. analyzed faceless YouTubers handwriting I think.. or smth like that and tried to draw what#they imagined their face to be#and general people jsut being obnoxious about asking#I have never ever in my life cared about what a youtuber has looked like ever#I didn’t know a lot of herm1tcraft members were open about what they look like for that very reason#I JUST DONT CARE..#so it’s like facinating to see it be such a big deal#like w/ r4nboo i never cared about seeing their eye#I could not personally give a fuck about what their eyes looked like at all#but I WAS happy that they were seemingly feeling more comfortable in their body#that’s cool#but even then it was like.. idk it was a distanced ‘wow proud of u’#maybe it’s cuz I’m always overly self aware of how I act about ccs due to like leftover purity culture#but I’m always so aware of like.. I don’t KNOW this cc they aren’t my friend they aren’t my anything ever they just make content#and I never will and I also don’t have a desire to#and it’s just truly like incomprehensible to me that someone would#lol#this was a long rant just to say ‘I don’t get why that guy is so special.. that’s just a guy?’#that’s a grown ass person I will never know and likely never speak too or even see in person#I got fictional characters to be rotating in my brain I don’t have time to think about what fuckin tu/bbos favorite color is or whatever#idc#at all
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cowboy-robooty · 2 years ago
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got desperate asf for some non-shitty heta fanfiction and said fuck it ill read the gerame fanfic cuz the author did make some good shit before (even tho i know it wont be THAT good since ill need to manually edit in my brain alfred as feliciano instead and make a whole extra unspoken lore to explain why feliciano is so ooc).... BUT LORD. IM CHEWING GLASS. IM CHEWING GLASS SO FUCKING HARD RIGHT NOW. BECAUSE GIRL ITALY EXISTS IN THIS FIC AND OH MY GODDDD I HATE IT HERE I HATE IT LUDWIG STAY AWAY FROM THAT MAN STAY AWAY FROM THAT EVIL DEMENTED VILE MAN AAAAHHAUHWUSUDJJS STAY WITH FELICIA PLEASEEE PLEASEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!! LIKE STRAIGHT UP HE DONT EVEN LIKE ALFRED BRUH AND ALFRED DONT EVEN LIKE HIM. ill admit the set up is good (its like a 1950s au and the reason why i trust this author is a whole nother can of worms that i put in my drafts maybe ill drop it later) BUT I CANT EVEN CARE OR TRY TO CARE ABOUT ALFRED X LUDWIG BC FELICIA IS RIGHT THEREE AND THIS AUTHOR GETS THEIR RELATIONSHIP TOGETHER TOO. SHES LITERALLY LIGHT OF HIS LAIF MAKES HIM HAPPY IS SWEET AND NICE TO HIM TUGS HIM DOWN AND RUBS THEIR NOSES TOGETHER LIKE MOTHERFUCKER THATS TRUE. THAT HAPPENED IN REAL LIFE I SAW IT. SO WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU WRITING THIS INTO A DAMN LUDWIG X ALFRED FANFIC IM CHEWING GLASSSSSS!!!! BC I KNOW FELICIA X LUDWIG WONT HAPPEN I HATE THIS STUPID BAKA LIFE I HATE IT HERE RAAAGJWJSIIEKDODKDKDKXKDKZKKS RAGE RAGE RAGE
so far its a genuinely good fic tho with some nice character development and being able to take a "real life universe" spin on heta characters which i find can rarely be done well! id rec it to any ameger fanheads out there!
peace and pascal! <- (im sorry im lying. im lying. tw lies. no peace only pascal. sorry i lied on main. its a good fic thats true. but i want the earth to explode. feels like im shoving my dick in an anthill)
#to be fair i read all non itager ship fics by mentally editing whoevers with germany to be italy bc i believe they love eachother in all#universes#but this author is making it real hard bc theyre genuinely good at like time era and how nationality plays into identity so i have to#do mental gymnastics and create the most batshit reasons ever to keep it itager in my head#but yeah THIS ONE ISNT LETTING ME FUCKING IMAGINE BECAUSE ITALY IS RIGHT FUCKING THERE#GIRL ITALY IS RIGHT THERE AND GENUINELY ACTS THE WAY THAT ITALY AND GERMANY ALWAYS INTERCAT WIF EACHOTHER LIKE IT ISNT EVEN OOC#THEY HAVE INTERACTED FOR A SOLID LIKE PAGE AND A HALF AND I SHIP THEM SO HARD SHES SO NICE TO HIMM#THEY RUBBED THEIR NOSES TOGETHER EVEN MOTHERFUCKER I THINK THEY DO THAT!!!!!!! YOU UNDERSTAND SO WHY DONT YOU PREACH?!?!?#YOU KNOW THE LORD IS REAL SO WHY DONT YOU FOLLOW THE TEN FUCKING COMMANDMENTS!!!!!#no shade to this author too this is just my aids bc to me any ship wif those two freaks that isnt them kissing eachother is my antichrist#anything that aint itager is my antichrist fr#the other fic from this author was just so much easier to eat..#cuz to be fair in the other fic it was a germany torture compilation and he literally did not genuinely love the other guy at all#i think that fic was true because italy wasnt present in it and i do believe germanys life would be like that would italy#what no italy does to a mf: unimagimeable suffering#i can accept that fic bc yeah i looked the author in the eyes and said 'germany would never love anybody thats not italy in all universes'#and they went okie! sure! :D#sorry guys im getting sepsis rn okay robooty when he faces the antichrist
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touhouweed · 1 year ago
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idk, it feels weird to run a big group and also feel very isolated
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brunetterightsactivist · 1 year ago
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im so serious where are all these girls finding nail salons that do these intricate designs. or like any design at all besides a 2007 style french manicure. i live near like 30 nail salons and if u go in any of them and ask for that they're gonna tell u they can't do it
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phagodyke · 1 year ago
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i keep getting irrationally miffed at ppl 😐😐
#'impressed by how much u can talk abt this considering youve not played either game'#fuck off. as if im not just trying to show interest bc u + another friend are both into them + constantly talk abt them in our gc!!#i mean since u guys talk abt them all the time + theyre huge on tumblr like. it would be hard for me to not know anything abt them at all#literally what else can i talk to u guys abt anyway. i dont think there are any interests i personally have that they both gaf abt#if anything they actively dislike most of the things im hyperfixated on. or at least she does so like i cant bring that up can i.#all i did was share a post i saw on tumblr that i thought was funny. its not like i had some negative/controversial opinion#i just saw it and thought hey that makes me think of my friends bc they like those things maybe theyll find it funny too!!#dog sitting outside the door with rly big sad eyes offering them a stick i found in a puddle#i like listening to them talk and i will eventually play some of the games theyre into myself cuz they make them sound rly cool#and even if theyre not my kind of thing i like sharing interests with other ppl and sometimes thats enough for me to be able to enjoy it#i literally own some of them already but im just not in the mental space to start smth new right now. which i have SAID!!!!#why do u even care girl. as if u dont already have a ton of friends playing it that ur talking to abt it???? i wont have anything to add#and thats not gonna stop u from being able to talk to me abt it anyway????? like 2/3 of our conversations atm are abt bg3#man. i know its not that deep but it makes me kinda sad for some reason. im just trying. i guess next time ill just let u guys talk-#to each other or at me and not comment or say anything so u can pretend im not here or whatever it is u want#ughh. she probably didnt even mean it like that and ill feel stupid for getting annoyed and delete this later but whatever.#might work out early today and then i can like draw or play a game or smth the rest of the day. alright lets go#.vent#listening to my silly little jfunk/jazz/soul playlist and i already feel over it. healing
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pa-pa-plasma · 1 year ago
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I feel like too many people don't understand that a bad person having normal human traits does not suddenly make them a good person
#& every person who thinks that way is sooo susceptible to abuse#like that's not a joke or anything like for real if you keep treating people as 2 dimensional#then you fall into the trap of ''they did 1 nice thing for me so they must not actually be bad''#you're allowed to like bad characters without scrambling to justify & write off their terrible actions & personality#like dude youre so desperate to not be caught liking something deviant youre using the same tactics as a H*rry P*tter fan#anyway i hope those people who like that asshole from ST never meet a Billy irl#cuz ive lived with Billys irl & it's not fucking fun. it's not interesting. it's living with an abusive piece of shit#just admit you think hes a good person because hes attractive. like youre fooling no one#if he didnt look like that youd call him a fucking freak. but he doesnt so hes just ''interesting to pick apart''#i can give you insight into that kind of person's brain: they literally would abuse you. they don't care. they think you deserve it#they can do nice things all they want but the ''niceness'' never quite reaches the same level the ''meanness'' gets to#theyre always paired together. they bought you an ice cream that costs less than a dollar? you owe them money plus interest#the reality of the situation is that every time someone like me sees you guys doing that#fawning over some asshole abuser & calling them perfect & explaining away their behaviour?#it literally sets me back. it makes me so fucking mad because that happens in real life. it's why the abuse never gets stopped#no one believes you because ''well they were nice to ME & look nice so i dont believe you''#i know how much you guys hate acknowledging apologism but like. that's abuse apologism right there
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thebigqueer · 2 months ago
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man i jus twish shed told m e how she was feeing and what she wanted fromme to make her feel more comforatble like this is so shittttt. i just want her back i want to be better for her if only i knew how to be
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isildheir · 1 year ago
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Honestly, my abuser saying Louis was just as bad as Lestat or basically implying they hate how people write Lestat off as more abusive than he is or that Louis was just as abusive was a red flag I should've put a lot more stock into.
#The guy was Empathizing with a capital E.#God hold me back cuz I LAUGH at them. Abuser all weh u..abused me..cuz...u called me stupid and annoying when I wouldn't let u leave me#after ur 30239929292th attempt#Youre abusive cuz...u made me feel so unloved when you kept trying to leave me! :'(((#LMAOAOOA yeah if thats abuse then slap my ass and call me sally cuz ill always try to leave you#You fuckin insane psychopath. constantly putting damn words in my mouth and telling ME what i ACTUALLY mean#you dont care about anything i have to say. you need to be the one slighted to justify why you feel so offended 24/7.#dude u wanna be a fucking victim so bad then fuckin be my guest u fuckin miserable sick sad sack of absolute dog shit#always calling me a liar and putting me on the podium to state my case infinite times till you hammered me into gaslighting myself#to support your interpretation. go to hell.#you are chronically miserable for a reason. and you will NEVER find reprieve in that. EVER. just as you deserve.#YOU made me start therapy because of the CONSTANT confusion and emotional trauma i endured with you.#YOU made me cry all the time at work.#YOU gave me chest pains and difficulty breathing. just seeing YOUR DAMN NAME on my phone gave me panic attacks#YOU did so much FUCKED UP SHIT to me and you NEVER ACCEPTED ANY REALITY BUT ME HURTING YOU ON PURPOSE#you literally tell me 24/7 i dont care about you and i would drop THOUSANDS of dollars on you#AND FUCKIN WATCH UR SHOWS 3 TIMES IN A ROW#AND CALL AND TEXT U EVERY NIGHT. SIT AND HELP YOU PREP FOR JOB INTERVIEWS.#I DREW UR DAMN OC SO OFTEN HE PRACTICALLY BECAME MY MOST DRAWN CHARACTER#I DID SO MUCH TO SHOW U I CARED. BE IT GIFTS. MONEY. BE IT TIME. BE IT HELPING IN#UR VTUBING CAREER U WANTED TO START.#BE IT SPENDING NIGHTS SOMETIMES TILL 6AM JUST MAKING SURE YOU'RE OKAY.#I JUST. DID. SO. FUCKING. MUCH. IT WAS NEVER ENOUGH FOR YOU. I HOPE YOU DIE. SUFFER. BURN IN HELL.#I HATE YOU. I HATE YOU. I WILL NEVER STOP HATING YOU.#I GAVE YOU SO MUCH. I WAS HAPPY TO TOO. WHAT A FOOL I WAS. NOTHING I DID WAS EVER ENOUGH. YOU ALWAYS HAD TO FUCKIN COMPARE#OR GET JEALOUS WHEN I SPENT ONE SECOND WITH ANYONE ELSE#U NEEDED TO GRILL ME FOR EVERYTHING#ASK WHO I WAS WITH#NEEDED TO KNOW WHAT I WAS DOING JUST IN CASE IT WAS SOMEONE YOU DIDNT LIKE#UR FUCKIN ABSURD. UR INSANE. ROT IN HELL. FUCKIN GET TORN APART DOWN THERE. I HOPE YOU SUFFER. I WANT TO WATCH. I WILL LAUGH.
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sk3l3t0n444 · 1 year ago
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i left my room to piss and get a drink and im am shaking like im being hunted for sport wtf
#why is my anxiety at an all time high???#i would like to be normal please!#my anxiety is so bad that i wont even let myself eat at all because im scared that someone poisoned the food...thats not logical at all ik#hell even getting some ginger ale was so hard for me...i have to keep reminding myself that theres nobody who is trying to brainwash me#i saw my door cracked open so i know someone was in my room...and im trying to be reasonable but its so hard when my anxiety is so bad...#as in i am trying to tell myself that nobody put razorblades in your bed and nobody poisoned your drink and nobody is trying to control you#nobody put cameras around your room nobody filled the house with gas and is going to set it on fire nobody put a tracking device on you...#im so paranoid for no reason...well there is a reason...but i honestly dont want to talk about it...and ill talk about anything...#so me saying i dont wanna talk about it is a huge indicator that its not very good...at all...#as in i cant talk about it with anybody...not even my closest friend knows...nobody knows...its just my secret that ill die with#there are a few secrets about my past that ill take to my grave...and thats saying something cuz i use humor to cope and i cant even joke...#im just a kid...and ive been to hell and back and i just want a fucking break...#idfk i just want to be normal...#sorry for venting so much im just kinda a mess...shits been really hard recently cuz of a ton of shit that i still dont wanna talk about#idfk sorry
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